Part Oneeeeeee.

"Who's Amber?"
"She's the girl who doesn't talk."
"Why can't you talk?"
*shrugs*

Kind of a dumb question if you ask me, even if the "asker" is asking out of curiosity... So yeah, I decided to start some 3-4 part series of things people should know about people like me and why. This goes for parents, teachers, classmates, family members... Everyone basically. So, I guess I can start with some things that have happened to me personally. The opening sentences have happened to me, and will keep happening if something isn't done... Which will take awhile to accomplish. -UGH.-

Another experience I've had was with a family member, and he basically implied that talking is easy to do, everyone can do it, and that I should because people will think this and that and so on about me. That made me feel stupid, honestly. It's a life-scarring experience for me, that seemed like it lasted forever at the time, but to other people who've done and said similar things will not give it another thought. Never.

People say things about me which aren't true (Rumors, der-her-her), literally kill me in side. I can't help not talking sometimes! It isn't my fault, it isn't my parent's fault, it isn't anyone's fault. All these professional experts people... They try so hard to figure out things about us, but to me that's over-whelming, because I'm still trying to figure out alot about myself... Inside I'm a 'normal' person with 'normal' dreams and 'normal' stuff to worry about. But then there's this other side of me that pops out, whenever it feels like. Like a jack-in-the-box... Except you have to turn the little cranks on those.. So bad analogy. Like DAISIES. -Smile- Except they are ugly daises, showing the horrible part of me that I can't control, and without those Weed Whackers, I keep growing and growing and nothing can stop me.

-Phew, mouthful of random thoughts that keep popping into my head. :) -

I don't exactly everything that happened today, or if it even happened, all I know is that today is Friday and that's supposed to be a good thing... I'll sleep in super late so maybe I'll get some things off my chest.

Genuis On iTunes Is My BFF.

Hello. Again. :)
So, I retrieved the poems from my mother, finally. The first one I wrote awhile ago, probably about a week or two ago. It's called Life In Technicolor. Enjoy! :

So the day I spoke up
And you heard my voice
I wasn't too sure
If you'd like the noise

But to me it felt great
Cause for me
I really changed fate

My whole life has been in black and white
And today I felt just like you
I saw a flash of life...
Only this time it was in color

I stared back in awe
And began to think
If only I had the strength
To see life like you
Life in technicolor


This second one I wrote a 12:30am on Wednesday, because I couldn't sleep. I was just going to lie and stare at the ceiling all night, until I got this crazy idea in my head and started writing it down. I think I kinda felt like I was going crazy, because I wrote it somewhat neatly yet fast. Soo yerp. (Yerp is my new word?) Enjoy this one too! :

There are some things in life that you just can't have: But to me it's just not fair, what did I ever do to lead myself to such despair? All of our broken hearts lie in the fading sun, waiting on Father Time, just to be fixed like a clock. My heart is not yet in that pile; I've kept it safe inside of my chest... but it's gotten way too hard to keep inside of my head, I'm ready to toss myself into that pile, waiting impatiently with all the other heartbreak, death and denial.

Comment? Please? Hah.

Hiii..... Again...

Yerp, so I know I haven't really posted here in awhile.. Sorry. I'm busy and have a lot going on that I can't really handle.. I even wrote a poem about it. :) I don't have it with me now... -MOM- So I guess I can post it later.. -.- But it was freakishly good and I wrote it at 12:30am on Wednesday in less than 5 minutes. I scared myself after reading it in the morning. >:O

Soo yea. I will post again soon, WITH my poem this time. :)

Ta ta for now.